How To Get Your Confidence Back As A New Mother in 4 Steps

So you’ve just experienced the miracle of life and brought your bub into the world. Congratulations on your bouncing bundle of joy! We know your baby is your everything right now, but it’s important to remember not to lose yourself, even when you’re dedicating all your time, energy and attention to the newest member of the family. It’s easy for your self-esteem to be put on the backburner, especially if it’s dropped due to the whirlwind of change in your life and your body, both during the pregnancy and now. Here are our top 4 tips to getting your confidence back on track and working that new mama mojo!

Treat yo’self

You just added a whole new person to the planet, and if that’s not an achievement, we don’t know what is! If you’re comfortable with leaving your child in the hands of a partner, family member, or other trusted babysitter for a few hours, reward yourself with some me-time. It’s important to your mental and physical wellbeing to take opportunities to destress, relax, or even just catch up on sleep with a much needed nap.

Why not indulge yourself in things you went without during your pregnancy? Catch up with friends over wine and an Instagrammable charcuterie board, or take a relaxing bath with some calming music, candles, and lots of bubbles (plus a glass of bubbly if you’re feelin’ a little ~fancy~). Let your mind wander to topics that don’t involve feeding times or changing dirty diapers, or you can go the extra mile and turn your bath into an even hotter, wetter, steamier experience with a waterproof sex toy!

Sexyland’s customers are really vibing with the Screaming O - Charged Positive Rechargeable Vibe, which is a fully waterproof 20-function bullet vibrator. It comes with a charging stand that doubles as a finger cradle when you flip it upside down, giving you a comfortable grip while manoeuvring the toy underwater. It’s also compact and a cinch to smuggle out of the bathroom in a dressing gown pocket when it’s time to return to being a badass mama bear.

Adapt to & embrace your new body

Don’t get trapped into thinking your body should bounce back overnight – ignore the Photoshop! It is inevitable that your body will have gone through some changes after giving birth, and while it’s okay to miss your pre-pregnancy figure, it’s also okay to love the skin you’re in. Take stock of anything that’s changed size, shape, or colour and think about what new wardrobe additions will best flatter your new features and assets. Consider it an excuse to go shopping for new clothing styles and cuts that might not have worked for you before but that you can rock now!

Try to strike a balance between both comfort and style with soft fabrics, especially if they’re going near your nipples. If your breasts have changed shape or size, consider buying a new bra that fits you properly and gives you the support you need. Padding is a lifesaver when it comes to nipples that are leaking or sensitive, and garments without underwires are a top pick for breastfeeding mums since they don’t put any pressure on your milk ducts.

And when it comes to lingerie, we know you might not be feeling your sexiest, but looking hot in bed doesn’t always have to be a skin-tight strappy number. Why not check out our range of flowy babydolls to add an element of mystique and allure to the bedroom? Babydoll-style lingerie is quite forgiving and skims over your shape thanks to its looser designs that float around your curves instead of clinging. They also offer some extra midsection coverage if you’re not ready to bare all just yet.

Get back into an exercise routine

Taking care of your body can have incredible results not only your physical appearance, but also your day-to-day happiness, attitude, and overall mental wellbeing. If you’re not ready to leave bubba yet, don’t worry about getting someone to cover babysitting duty, just bring your baby along with you! Skip the gym and do some Mummy & Me exercises with the cutest workout buddy ever, either at home or on a socially-distanced stroll outside. Not only is it safe to take your baby out in public almost right after they’re born, it’ll be good for both of you to get some fresh air and sunshine. Just remember to limit direct sun exposure, dress appropriately for the weather, and stay vigilant against germs, especially in the wake of the coronavirus.

For solo workout sessions that are just for you, your OB-GYN has probably recommended you start doing kegel exercises to speed up your recovery after childbirth. Not only will strengthening your kegel muscles help you return to a tight and toned pelvic floor faster, there are other health and wellbeing benefits, like reduced risk of urinary incontinence and a more satisfying sex life! It’s hard to exercise muscles you can’t see though, so take the guesswork out of kegels and let a smart toy like the Elvie Kegel Exerciser & Tracker give you feedback on how you’re doing in real time! This device pairs with a smartphone app to monitor and display your progress live so you can visualise your workout and get the most out of your kegels!

Fake it ‘til you make it

In a perception-obsessed world, it’s all too easy to feel as though the world is judging you for not being a supermum 24/7, especially when you factor in how keeping up appearances on social media is impacting new mums. It’s unreasonable to expect yourself to be the perfect mother, especially if this is your first rodeo, but nobody wants to seem like they’re not in control or cracking under the pressure either. As a result, there are plenty of new parents employing the age-old strategy of faking it ‘til they make it in the face of the child-rearing chaos.

If putting on a brave face for the world is how you choose to express your ability to stay on top of things, then all the more power to you! But if you’re struggling and don’t have it in you to pretend you’re not, don’t be afraid to ask for help from your partner, friends, and family. There’s also no shortage of online support forums and local community groups for new mothers to turn to.

If you suspect more serious issues like postpartum depression, we encourage you to speak openly to a medical professional or therapist. Your family deserves the best, and you’re part of your family too. After all, you gotta look out for you to look out for your bub and give them the best start to life!