The Lowdown on Anal Sex

Following on from last week’s article about anal lubricant, we noticed there are plenty of folks who are new to the world of anal sex-ploration and want to know more about how to have the best experience. The Sexyland Fun Specialists are here to dish the deets on everything from what precautions to take for safe anal sex to the best anal play accessories, erotic toys, and anal care products to ensure a healthy, pleasurable experience from start to explosive finish!

How To Prepare for Anal Sex

People have been loving anal sex since at least the time of the Ancient Greeks, and interest hasn’t really dwindled since so it’s no surprise that Sexyland has covered how to prepare for anal sex in the past. Here’s a basic breakdown of the essential steps you should take in order to have the best time possible:

1. The sensation of anal penetration stimulates a lot of the same muscles and nerves involved in having a bowel movement (BM) and can trigger the feeling of needing to go, so for your peace of mind, it’s best to empty your bowels at least a couple of hours before you get down to business.
2. Cleaning and grooming your behind before anal sex is always a good idea, not just for your peace of mind, but also for hygiene reasons. You can use intimate cleansing wipes if you’re short on time, jump in the shower and scrub thoroughly back there with body wash, or use a douche or enema for a more thorough, internal cleanse. Douching is the most common type of anal cleansing, though an enema is the most intense and thorough, and also the most time-consuming. The artist BlindJaw has given everyone in the world permission to use their illustrated guide on anal cleansing to help you decide whether a douche or enema suits your needs better, as well as how to perform them, so feel free to pass on the information to save other tops and bottoms in need!
3. Have some clean towels and lubricant laid out and ready to go. Nobody wants to be caught up in the moment and have to interrupt the flow of the fun when just a little bit of preparation can make the whole experience a seamless delight!

Safety Measures to Take During Anal Sex

• Have a safeword or signal — safewords are a way to let your partner you’re getting close to or have reached your limit, which is especially important during kinky play. If you’re playing with gags and can’t speak to get your partner’s attention, consider having a non-verbal signal instead, like tapping them when you need to slow down or holding a set of keys and shaking them if your wrists are restrained.
• Use a condom with partners and toys, especially if you’re sharing them — safe sex is important no matter what kind of sex you’re having, though some studies show that anal sex is riskier than vaginal sex. The theory is that STI and HIV transmission is more likely via unprotected anal sex than unprotected vaginal sex due to the thinner lining of the anal tissue being more vulnerable, and it’s always better to be safe than sorry, especially if you or your partner are untested and haven’t had the fluid bonding talk. Swapping used barriers for fresh ones between toys, partners, and orifices also cuts down on cleanup, which is another win for condoms. Just be sure to use a condom with a lubricant that’s condom-compatible (so that means no oil-based formulas)!
• Use LOTS of lubricant — unlike the vagina, the anus does not self-lubricate, meaning the tissues back there are more sensitive to tearing if there’s too much friction. However, this is easy to solve by using plenty of lubricant! The best lubricants for anal sex will be labelled as anal-specific as these are usually longer-lasting and have a thicker texture for more comfortable cushioning.
• Consider skipping anal lubricants that contain numbing ingredients — if you’re nervous about pain or discomfort during anal penetration, it might seem like a good idea to seek out lubricants with benzocaine, lidocaine, and other numbing ingredients, but these can make it harder to tell when things aren’t going how they should back there, and are generally not recommended (especially if you’re a backdoor beginner). Just listen to your body and take things as slowly as you need to in order to feel safe and comfortable. A good partner will listen to your request to ease into things at whatever pace you need.

Lubrication 101: Choosing the Right Lube for Anal Sex

The Sexyland Fun Specialists discussed the different types of anal lubricant at length in last week’s blog article, so here’s a recap of what each formula is best for:

• Water-based anal lubricants — these are great for general use and folks who prefer a formula that feels lightweight, spreads easily, and absorbs into the skin for a non-greasy, non-sticky feeling. Water-based formulas tend to require more frequent reapplications but they’re easier to clean up with plain water post-play. They’re also compatible with all anal sex toys, including those made of silicone!
• Silicone-based lubricants — these formulas are thicker and more viscous in texture, meaning they last longer between applications and offer a ‘cushioning’ effect against friction for more comfortable play. It’s important to remember that they’re not compatible with silicone anal sex toys, but they are water-resistant, meaning they won’t wash away if you’re indulging in some hot and steamy play in the shower or tub…

Exploring Anal Toys: Top Picks from Sexyland

What anal sex toys are best for beginners?

• Butt plugs — ah, the trusty anal plug. These come in a huge range of sizes to suit any experience level, including teeny-tiny ones that are non-intimidating and, for lack of a better word, cute. If that’s where you want to start, we recommend starting with a mini plug like the Small Anal Adventures Platinum Silicone Beginner’s Plug to get used to the sensation of having something between your cheeks at all before moving up to larger sizes if you decide you’re ready for something more substantial.
• Anal beads — beads are some of the most iconic, quintessential anal sex toys around and are super-easy to use! The starting bead is usually the smallest for easy insertion, and the following beads increase in size as you get closer to the end of the strand of beads. You can insert as many or as few of the beads as you like to suit your preferences and work your way up at any pace you’re comfortable with.
• Anal training kits — these anal sex toys come in a set, usually of butt plugs in gradually increasing sizes so you can choose which one to use to suit your comfort level and desires at any time.

What advanced anal sex toys does Sexyland recommend?

• Weighted butt plugs — consider these more as ‘intermediate’ anal sex toys, because if you love the feeling of fullness that a regular plug provides, these weighted versions will kick it up a notch without the stretch! The heaviness of the plug puts more pressure on the sphincter muscles, making it feel more filling without actually requiring any additional girth or stretching your anal canal. Sexyland’s own Mighty Weighted Silicone Butt Plug comes in a small, medium, and large size to suit any experience level and has a curved T-bar base for comfortable long-term wear.
• Inflatable butt plugs — if you just can’t get enough of that full, stretched out feeling, an inflatable anal plug is a top pick for you. The plug’s uninflated starting size is easy to insert, and then once it’s in, you can activate the inflation function (either through a hand-squeeze ball or by pushing a button on motorised toys) to feel the plug swelling to a deliciously full size inside you! You can also deflate the plug while it’s in place to make removing it quick and easy after playtime comes to a close.
• Oversized and fisting dildos — for adventurous explorers who are keen on gaping or extremely deep and/or girthy penetration, look no further than our collection of large anal sex toys! If you’re confident that your booty can take something this big, Sexyland’s customers love double penetration dildos that stack two dildos side by side, super-long anal hoses, super-long and super-girthy butt plugs, and large dildos that are fit for any size queen…

Must-Have Cleaning & Care Products for Anal Toys

• Anal douches/enemas — these are great for getting a deeper, internal cleanse than what intimate wipes or a shower can give you if you want that extra peace of mind before and during anal penetration. For quick and easy douching, the Mr. Play Super Power Anal Cleansing Douche is beloved by Sexyland customers for its simplicity and fuss-free use that is great for all experience levels, including backdoor beginners.
• Antibacterial sex toy cleaner — the colon is naturally home to thousands and thousands of beneficial gut bacteria that humans need to keep their digestion processes running smoothly, but they can do more harm than good if they stay on the surface of a used toy and are left to multiply. That’s why cleaning sex toys (especially anal sex toys) after every use is so important. Sexyland recommends the Wicked® Foam 'N Fresh Anti-Bacterial Toy Cleaner, which is vegan-friendly and safe for sensitive skin while still being tough on germs so everyone can enjoy a squeaky-clean finish!
• An adult toy bag — regardless of what material your anal sex toys are made of, all adult toys can be prone to picking up dust and lint while rolling around in your bedside drawer, and some are recommended to be kept away from other toys of certain materials to prevent reactions from occurring. Toy bags are also great for keeping your toys hidden from direct sunlight and prying eyes, because your pleasure is your business and doesn’t need to be anybody else’s.

Feeling peachy-keen and ready to explore the backdoor and beyond? Shop erotic anal sex toys in-store and get personalised advice on all the best anal care products and anal play accessories from our Fun Specialists on all things anal, or get 2hr Delivery on selected bestsellers when shopping Sexyland online!